Hi, I’m Crystal!

Hello world! I started this blog when I left social media in October and have started creating time and space daily to check in here. I’m still learning! I’m a writer/poet/researcher/healer… and I waitress on the side! I have three kids, two of them are adults now so I find myself with a lot of time to discover what I love in this next phase of my life. I am a hopeless romantic. I’m currently in love with spoiling myself with the time, energy, and love that I have far too often given away too freely. I love poetry and pink skies and hate the cold. I am manifesting a big move after my last baby graduates in two years.

A New Beginning

I believe we all have a story to tell. The uniqueness of each person is so beautiful to me. I write a lot about beauty and pain. I have learned that I am only whole when I acknowledge both. I dance with my pain as often as I dance with my joy and that is beautiful to me.

I have struggled with many challenges. Being raised in poverty and addiction is an unfair beginning that many of us face. I began drinking and using drugs when I was very young. After my father’s suicide when I was 19, I was heavily into cocaine and hit my first rock bottom. A year after his death, I went to rehab. I have faced many challenges in my life. Growing up in poverty and around addiction presented an unfair start that many of us endure. I began drinking and using drugs at a very young age. After my father’s suicide when I was 19, I fell deeply into cocaine use and hit my first rock bottom. A year after his death, I decided to go to rehab.

Words of Wonder

Through writing, I can put all my joy, pain, love, and sorrow on a page and connect the words to create something beautiful. In a world that more often than not, feels disconnected, writing transcends every hurdle I face to find the beauty and joy around every corner I turn.

I started writing because I needed to be able to see where it all went wrong. Then, I needed to see where it all went right. When I began, I had no idea that the joy was in the process. I was certain I would feel complete as soon as I published something, or was recognized as great.

As I continued my writing journey, I realized how easily I could find and create joy if I could release my shame. Growing my writing has included a lot of “shedding my shame,” I call it. It has been a treat to get to know myself again on the other side of a lifetime of people-pleasing and being a high-functioning co-dependent.

So, dear readers, welcome to my shit show. I’ll be shedding shame to integrate my shadow parts, having conversations with my inner child, and processing my past to make peace with it. I’m a podcast junkie so I’ll share my favorites and in the next few weeks, I’ll begin a book club because I’m challenging myself to read some fiction! If you have any recommendations, send me a message!